You all know the score – head pounding like you’re the one guy who really did get roundhouse kicked by Chuck. Mouth feeling like a hamster fell asleep in it, and he’s not waking up for the world. And the bags under your eyes are so big Pick ‘n Pay wants to sell them at the till.
I, for one, have had enough. And my body’s been trying to let me in on this “secret” for a while now. Enter the Detox (*insert studio audience Oooooh*) Fresh air, clean living, good food etcetera. Sounds like a pretty good plan, but where to start? So I do the logical thing and Google it, at which point I ‘m directed to “Colon Cleanse for Radiant Health, a site by Martha Volchok””Great, Now even the internet is trying to tell me I’m full of shit. Moving along then…
After a few more keystrokes accompanied by a bit of reading and searches I arrive at the following conclusions:
i) Smoking, it not so good for me
ii) Drinking, it also not so good for me, (but yummier than smoking)
iii) Americans not really good for anything
iv) Fast food called fast cos it get to belly quick.
Now, in a move that has been met with raised eyebrows, mocking chuckles and grins of disbelief, I’ve given up all of the above. Including Americans. At least for a month anyway. The object of this dastardly plan is to feel good during the month of June, which is of course, my birthday month, so then when THAT raucous party happens and I feel like I need a colon cleansing the next day, at least I know for sure it was THAT party, and not jus a knock on effect.
I’ve already started on the road to feeling annoyingly good, starting with Small Guy Big Car chucking out a ¾ full pack of Camel Lights out on the N1 and revoking my drinking privileges on Sunday night at Deluxe (which rocked, btw). And I must admit that I actually feel pretty crap. No relief, no looking like the lady on the Senakot ad. But then, that might be cos I haven’t had my colon cleansed lately (have you?).
So if anybody feels like they need to take a break and detox, get that sparkle in your eye back, or that spring in your step. Then do it now. Cos the more of you that do it too, the les of you there are to make fun of me.
Cheers (without a drink) till next week,
Completely useless P.S’s:
Firstly, the next One Night stand event is coming soon, so keep your eyes and ears peeled for that.
Second, some of you know that I do a bit of design on the side, and consider it a sort of informal duty to completely rubbish SL Magazine’s cover each month. Well, here’s what’s come up for this month: