Starbucks coming to Costa Rica. Hipsters launch silent ironic non-protest protest.

So Starbucks is coming to Costa Rica. Which is great. But for some reason, this is the first thing that popped in to my brain.

“Costa Rican Hipsters Protest Starbucks”

Lester Hein Reporting -San Jose, Costa Rica

Hipsters across San Jose are up in arms following the announcement from international coffee giant Starbucks that they will be opening franchises in the city.

Juan A Sole, a local hipster commented on the issue –

 “Until now, all I had to do to look cool was wear my older brother’s skinny jeans from the 80s with our grandfather’s glasses and just, you know, walk around with my retro headphones on. If Starbucks opens, other hipsters will be sitting there with their new iPads and Macbooks. I still have last year’s iPad – this is going to ruin me. I can’t afford those new things, I mean, I live with my parents, where will they find the money?” 

Juan’s father, mister R Sole-Raiser could not be reached for comment at the time of press.

When attempting to reach other hipsters for comment, they were unable to come out of their oversized pastel colored headphones to respond. A spokesperson from the Cigarette Pants union has said that a statement will be issued when it appears to be least expected and considered most ironic.

When asked whether local hipsters will be boycotting the coffee house, he replied that his union members would, in fact,  frequent their local Starbucks often and for hours on end, but that they “would not enjoy it or even like it a little bit the whole time they are there” as a form of protest.